Monday, March 28, 2005

All-Tattoo Team

A bonus update for everyone today, compliments of my friend Dez. While chatting on the phone with Dez on Saturday evening, he made an offhand remark that he was trying to find a 5th starter for his all-tattoo team of the tournament. I told him that I needed him to give that to me in writing so that I could toss it into an update. Today he did just that, and it is a phenomenal team, I must say. So without further adieu, here's Dez's 2005 NCAA tournament all-tattoo team. Enjoy:

As we discussed the other night, I've named the NCAA Tournament All-Tattoo team. There were plenty of tattoos in the tournament this year, plenty of barbed wire arm bands, lots of Chinese symbols, dice, cards, crosses and baby's momma's names but to make this team, you've got to be creative (or really white with Division 3 biceps).

The point guard on this team is Mike Nardi from Villanova. He's listed at 175, but that's a little generous. His arm is covered with a big, orange basketball (which wraps around most of his arm), which has "Mike D" scrawled across it. Apparently Mike is moonlighting with the Beastie Boys.

At shooting guard, we're going with Deron Williams from Illinois. Deron also goes with the large basketball, though his arms are much more respectable than Nardi's. Williams has chosen to go with the state of Texas under the ball and a bunch of stuff on his other arm. It's hard to get a good luck at that other arm, since the basketball / Texas arm has the brightest orange color I've ever seen in a tattoo, which really just leads to a bunch of questions - did he choose Illinois so the colors coordinated? Will he add the State of Illinois to the mix? Is that where Bruce Weber's tailor got the color for that sport coat?

Our small forward is Rashad McCants from North Carolina. Rashad brings some literary talent to the squad, with his bicep ink reading "Born to be hated" on one arm, "Dying to be loved" on the other. Is that Shakespeare? While I normally assume college athletes are majoring in General Studies, African American Studies, Communications or some other broad major, I'm guessing Rashad's going the English Literature route.

With at big performance in the Sweet 16 (okay it was only 6 minutes, with no points and two turnovers) Wisconsin's Jason Chappell makes the first team. I don't even know what that is on his arm. All I could see was a lot of ink, not a lot of arm. If psychiatrists ever start to use tattoos for the ink blot recognition test, Jason's got himself a job.

As for the center, I have to admit, I've been Pittsnogled. As a native West Virginian, tattooing is in this guy's blood. He's not the best basketball player to come out of West Virginia, but he is giving Jason "White Chocolate" Williams a run for best heavily tattooed basketball player to come out of the Mountain State. Jerry West might have the NBA logo modeled after his image, but could there possibly be a better candidate for the D-League logo?

So there you have it, your All-tattoo, All-tournament team. Not exactly "One Shining Moment" but I'm sure there's a theme song out there somewhere for these guys.

1 Comments:

At 1:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dickie V needs this tourney team on his website. Forget the All-Rolls Royers, who hasn't talked about Pittsnogle being tatted up.

 

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